I know many people who have disagreed with the way my mom raised me. Most of those people, I definitely think could raise their own children differently than their own approach. I was raised in church but always with the understanding that I could talk to Mom about anything. Because of this, Mom and I became like the Gilmore Girls, except I have a brother as well but it was the same basic dynamic. Mom was our closest friend. She knew all of our secrets and we knew most of hers. Her finances were no mystery to us, nor were here aspirations or personal convictions. She was (well still is) zany, ornery, fun, quirky, and almost instantly loveable. I can count the amount of people who dislike my mom on one hand. While this “Mom is our friend” understanding did cut into the respect aspect of the parent-child relationship, we are closer because of it, even after we’ve all gone our separate ways.
When I become a parent, I intend to exhibit kindness and patience, making life an adventure for my children rather than deciding it all for them or making them feel small for trying to follow their imaginations. I intend to use what I’ve learned from Mom, Hollywood and my own experience to make my child feel special and loved no matter what happens.
Now that I’ve shared a bit of my story, let’s talk about Hollywood. It’s interesting to me how people seem to blame the veritable epidemic of pregnancy that seems to have swept over teenagers and young adults, on Hollywood’s evil influence. (Sometimes, it may seem that I’m exaggerating when I say “evil” but that is what many people literally see it as.) And on top of that they say that so many of these girls are immature and not fit to raise a child. I will agree to some extent, it seems pretty impossible. But it happens that many young girls rise to the occasion when they have a baby, and that baby becomes their everything. As it is with Lorelai Gilmore.
Gilmore Girls- The Single Mom/ Best Friend
Lorelai Gilmore is essentially every girl’s dream mom. She gets giddy about eating candy while watching Willy Wonka, loves her coffee, is kind to everyone who needs it and is absolutely best friends with her daughter. Having been raised in a suffocating high-society family, Lorelai introduces her daughter Rory (whom she had at the age of 16) to everything she never got to experience. Living in a small town where literally everyone’s business is anybody’s business, Rory and Lorelai make fun of the silly arguments and simply live their lives as they enjoy them most. Lorelai does not let Rory run around all the time without consequence but what sticks out to me is that she takes into account her daughter’s attitude towards life and her temperament. She knows when discipline is needed and acts accordingly. That’s my issue with many parenting stlyles today. The moment any sort of possibly negative energy is detected, they have charged forward to full out yelling, scolding and arguing. We could learn a lesson or two from Lorelai Gilmore on how to parent, especially kind, soft-spoken and academically driven children. I know I have learned from her and I don’t even have kids yet!
What do you think?
Did you have a single parent growing up? Did watching shows about single parents give you an understanding of their lives, an understanding that would have been difficult to find without those shows or movies? Any other ideas for the single parenting segment? I’d love a great idea for a single dad Hollywood discussion or any ideas for the expansion of this subject of single mom approaches to parenting. 🙂 Thanks for the feedback and keep searching through the grime to find those pearls, I think they’re closer to the surface than we think!